Lyrics
"The Reptile Cafe"
Copyright © 1995 Joanne Shaw. All Rights Reserved.
Written by Joanne Shaw
I drove up to the restaurant, the first I'd seen today.
I parked my car and entered. It'd been hours since I ate.
I took the last remaining table at the crowded cafe.
The waitress smiles and tells me all the specials of the day.
"We got alligator soup. We got crocodile pie."
"Get a lizard in your coffee for a dollar-forty-five."
"Turtle is our specialty. I recommend sauteed."
"You'll always ask for seconds at The Reptile Cafe."
I won't pretend I was pleased with the choices I heard.
I was raised on mashed potatoes, and I seldom diverge.
But just this once, I'll be a sport, and try a different dish.
After all the turtle's similar to chicken or fish.
"I'll take some alligator soup. I'll take some crocodile pie."
"Put a lizard in my coffee for a dollar-forty-five."
"If turtle is your specialty, I'll try some sauteed."
"I hope the food is like the service at The Reptile Cafe."
The place was filled with customers who travelled many miles.
They wake up to their toads and eggs and go to sleep with smiles.
About to make a graceful exit when my food came to me.
I might just learn what all this fuss could ever be.
I try my alligator soup, cry in my crocodile pie.
I chew the lizard in my coffee worth a dollar-forty-five.
Turtle is their specialty I wish they'd walk away.
I'll pass on second helpings from The Reptile Cafe.
I was warned by momma dear to always clean my plate.
It's rude to show the starving folks exactly what you waste.
But if ever an exception, this is surely it.
If you're ever eating dinner here, don't bring your etiquette.
Spill your alligator soup. Spill your crocodile pie.
Keep the lizard from your coffee; Save a dollar-forty-five.
I warn you, turtle is their specialty, don't let 'em on your plate.
You'll leave a vegetarian from The Reptile Cafe.
Cause the menu says:
"Alligator soup. Crocodile pie."
"Get a lizard in your coffee for a dollar-forty-five."
"Turtle is our specialty. We recommend sauteed."
"You'll always ask for seconds at The Reptile Cafe."
~~ the end
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